The Form 5's have this class once a week called KPD in which the councelor comes in and kind of brief us about college life. One of his questions kind of made me think about my future. Somehow wherever I have his class, it gives me the goose bumps just thinking about the future. You see, he asked us to stand up and asked every sigle one of us what we wanted to take in college and what we wanted to be. WHAT WE WANTED TO BE . That kept me wonderin, and wondering until now. What exactly do I want ? I had to lie to him and say that I wanted to be a dentist. Twas a white lie, I have definitely NO INTEREST in being a dentist. But I keep wondering, what exactly do I want ? What if medics isnt my thing? What if I have no interest in being a doctor? What if I fail at being one. Because the teacher once said, your future depends on what YOU wanna be, not what your parents want you to be. I keep wondering, is medics what I want or is it whatmy parents want me to take. I swear to god, the future confuses me. College life confuses me. We had to do a research on which College and what course we are interested in taking and I swear my mind is blank right now, cause I dont know a single fuck about the courses that are available, this scares me :'( The teacher event told me, I couldnt become a Doctor because my pointer was low, 2.87 to be exact. In order to become a doctor you need to be atleast a 3.5er. i kind of got terasa when he said that but I took it positively and just thought of it as motivation for me to study harder so that I could proof to him that I can actually reach my target. But a part of me still wonders, what if I dont qualify to become a doctor ? what if .. what if. what if... unanswered questions fill my head. Its all so confusing ! I know some of you might think " ceh SPM tak lepas lag nak cakap pasal college" mind you, for a person like me I really care about my future and I need to properly plan it in order to aim for it so STFU . Haih, this calls for a trip to the councelor's office then . goodnight